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| Image Credit: Coheed & Cambria |
Sometimes you have to take three steps backwards before you can move forward. With that being said, the two theme songs for this post are "Love Yourself" by Justin Bieber and "Basket Case" by Green Day (two songs that probably couldn't sound more different).
I have to apologize for something, but I'm not making this apology to anyone else. I am apologizing to myself because I lied to myself. I said I wouldn't leave my friends and family again, but it happened again. And this time it took me to a place that scared the ever-living shit out of me.
I have a problem. But the best part of having a problem is knowing that you have the tools to fix it. Ever since I was young I have always excelled at mathematics and finding the solution to an equation.
The solution to this "math" problem is basic subtraction:
1+1=2
So, conversely 2-1=1.
Basic logic.
I am not alone, nor will I ever be if I value the relationships in my life. But the most important thing I learned from this life-changing foray into darkness is that you have to love yourself before you can love other people.
I met some of the most incredible people this weekend. And though they all have their own issues, they aren't alone in the struggle. Quoting Billy Joel, "We all have our cross to bear."
If you're lucky, you have other people in your life who are willing to share the load. Be it Samwise Gamgee, Siri, or a youth you have always underestimated, the world is too precious to allow others to dwell in the shadows of obscurity.
And more than anything else, you need to let people know 1) when you need them the most, and 2) that you appreciate everything they have done for you.
My final sentiment today is that we all have our own ways of coping with fear. I already know what mine is, and if you can't tell already it has something to do with organizing letters and numbers on paper. But these coping mechanisms aren't exclusive to dealing with trauma; you can also use them to explain your life and your personal story to anyone that doesn't understand.
The world is filled with billions of people; therefore, it is also filled with billions of stories.
Again, basic logic.
The next time you see me, ask me about mine. I'm sure it is far different from yours, and I know that you can't tell my story nearly as well as I can.
But also know that you are the only person who can tell your story with the utmost honesty and passion. So I'll leave you with a few helpful words from my favorite band, Coheed & Cambria:
"Give them a story -- they want you to."
© Austin T. Murphy 2016
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